Or Everything That Matters Breaks In Two
by Estheim
Summary: Confidence in their own ability to keep themselves under wraps can lead the Hitachiin brothers to disaster. What can they do when it seems that everything that matters to them might break apart? HikaKao, future mentions of HikaHaru and TamaHaru.


**Disclaimer:** _Ouran High School Host Club_ and all of its characters belong to Bisco Hatori; this is just a shameless work that isn't for profit. Also, the story and chapter titles for this will all be references to the song "Another Heart Calls" by the All-American Rejects and the Pierces.  
**Notes:** As the sequel to _In Place of Modesty_, this was a completely unintentional creation; that said, the intention of this piece is to give a little more insight into the twins' thoughts and feelings, as well as perhaps answer some questions left behind by what was, really, a completely shameless excuse for shower sex (really, I can't put that one any other way no matter how much I think about it). Why have the twins completely disregarded the danger to themselves and their family if the truth is discovered? Why did Hikaru so easily decide to stop pursuing Haruhi? Why was Hunny so supportive, to the extent of even possibly pushing Kaoru towards Hikaru? Well, I'm not positive of if I'll be able to explain all of these perfectly, but I'm hoping to at least try to manage it for all of you, as my way of saying "thank you" for all of the kind words, comments, and reviews that you have given me. I would also like to note that, as opposed to its predecessor, this will likely be a multi-chapter story. As such... I know that this first part isn't exactly the most phenomenal thing ever, but please bear with it. It was the best that I could come up with to lead into the story and set things up. The next chapter should be a little more exciting...  
**Warnings:** The obvious twincest and sexual situations warnings are there, obviously.  
**Spoilers:** As with _In Place of Modesty_, if you haven't read from about chapter 45 through to the current chapter of the manga, there'll be spoilers for you.

**Or Everything That Matters Breaks In Two**  
_Until the Sun Would Wash the Sky_  
by Josie (**artes**)

Three weeks.

Everything that he'd ever known to be true had changed, drastically and irrevocably, in just three weeks; it wasn't that the changes were unwelcome, simply that they still felt odd when he considered them. The arms around his waist drifting down lower than he would first expect when he had his back to his twin brother, the lips on his neck lingering longer than he remembered and the often-accompanying soft lick both seemed to always register moments too late to his mind. Every time that happened, he almost wondered how it had so easily come to pass, how Hikaru had been so open to advancing their relationship into something more than just hints and acts. It was almost laughable, in a way; here he was, the one who'd probably entertained the idea of it more actively without even realizing it, and yet he was being far more reserved than his brother. Not that it was uncommon for him to be at least a little more reserved than Hikaru in most things.

Amber eyes looked upward, gaze softening as it landed on the other boy's chin. He was slowly growing used to waking up like this, in either Hikaru's bed or his own - not that it particularly mattered too much which was his and which was _his_, as they'd always kept their beds pushed together - curled up together under soft sheets, Hikaru's arms around him in a warm embrace that might have been even a bit overprotective and his own forehead more often than not pressed against the older twin's chest. Some mornings, he wondered how they'd managed to end up in that position, being more than just a little certain that they'd fallen asleep at least a little differently. Other mornings, he puzzled over how they'd managed to _remain_ in that position throughout the night. He knew more than well enough that Hikaru had never been the most placidly still sleeper that the world had ever seen; he also knew just where his own dreams led recently, and he was more than just a little confident that Hikaru's were of the same sort - especially after the events of the day before. Or, rather, he knew beyond any shadow of a doubt that his brother's dreams were very much like his own; there was plenty of evidence to support that when they awoke in the morning. Even after they managed to pull out of the heated, dangerously sensual haze that they always seemed to find themselves in when first awaking now.

This morning, his arms were trapped between their bodies - he knew that he would be left with that tingling sensation of his nerves reviving themselves when he and his twin would finally pull apart - with his palms pressed flat against Hikaru's chest. His gaze turned forward again and he smiled, leaning in just enough to brush his lips against smooth skin, humming appreciatively as he did so. Hikaru hugged him tighter at that, stirring slightly before settling down once more, one leg over both of Kaoru's now, drawing him closer. The younger twin shifted slightly, attempting to make himself a little more comfortable in spite of the largely welcome confinement against his brother's body.

That was when Hikaru's hold tightened again, nose rubbing lightly against soft copper hair as he emitted an indistinguishable sound before murmuring sleepily, "Kaoru..." Golden eyes glanced up again before he tilted his head up, the corners of his lips turning upwards marginally as he attempted to pull himself up, just enough to press his lips to his older brother's in a chaste kiss. He didn't move after, leaving his mouth against his twin's and simply waiting; in his head, he began to count. _One... two... three..._ It was a slow ticking off of numbers that moved evenly with the passing seconds, but he knew exactly what he was waiting for.

Kaoru wasn't disappointed as Hikaru's lips moved against his for a second kiss.

It was obvious that the older twin was still caught in his dream as one hand slid low on Kaoru's back; the redhead had to bite back a faint sound of discomfort as he was tugged closer still, a warm, wet tongue touching his lips lightly after just a moment. He yielded with the briefest hint of hesitance, mouth opening just a fraction to allow the tip of his brother's tongue to pass in, although Hikaru didn't press any advantage. Altogether, it was a surprisingly sweet kiss, particularly in light of the older twin's current still-dreaming state, Kaoru noted with a faint sense of oddly amused detachment - something that he could only accomplish in moments like this, while Hikaru still slept. If he was awake...

When Hikaru was awake, he was able to overwhelm his younger brother far too quickly and too easily, and _thinking_ would be the farthest thing from the redhead's mind. Regardless of how faint the touches or how gentle the kisses may have been.

His brother's tongue receded back to his own mouth just as golden eyes slowly opened, lips downturning into a slight frown momentarily before his arms further tightened their hold on Kaoru again, forcing the younger twin to elicit a quiet hiss. Immediately, the embrace loosened, Hikaru rolling onto his back and pulling Kaoru onto himself as his eyes flooded with concern. "Kaoru?" A slight shake of the head and Hikaru found himself staring down at limp red hair instead of his brother's precious face as he had been mere seconds earlier. His frown deepened, but the expression relaxed as he felt that same hair tickling his skin as Kaoru nestled his head into the space below and just to the left of his chin, face pressing into the juncture of his neck and shoulder. "...Did I hurt you?" Another shake of the head. Hikaru's left hand traveled up his brother's spine slowly as he turned his gaze up to the ceiling, a faint smile playing at his lips as his fingers brushed into Kaoru's hair; the other boy sighed contentedly and snuggled closer to him. Still, something nagged at him. "You don't have to hide it if I did, you know; I wasn't exactly..."

The words trailed off, and Kaoru grinned against his skin. "Hikaru. You should know better than anyone that I'm not so fragile that I'd need you to be _gentle_." But when he shifted and hissed again in slight discomfort - both from the waking nerves in his arms and the momentary throbbing from ones farther down that served as a reminder of just _what_ they'd been doing the previous day - Hikaru's fingers tightened their hold where they were threaded into his hair. Not painfully, but protectively. Maybe possessively. Neither spoke; Hikaru was content with waiting for Kaoru to continue while trying to keep himself from becoming overwhelmed with the hovering protectiveness that he'd always felt for his twin, and Kaoru was merely riding out the overpowering tingling and aching of nerves, biting his lip to hold in quaking breaths and clenching amber eyes shut tight. Finally, the feeling of spider legs dancing over his arms faded - the not entirely unpleasant soreness farther down his body didn't, but he wasn't expecting it to just yet - and he tilted his head up with a nod and a lazy smile. "Maybe it was once too many..." he mused. The words were met with a soft snort from his older twin, the firm chest he was laying against convulsing for a moment before calming; the fingers in his hair relaxed, stroking gently and soothingly.

"I didn't hear you complaining at the time..." Hikaru responded slyly, eyes shifting to bring Kaoru back into his line of vision just as the copper-haired teenager pulled up from where he had been relaxing to stick his tongue out at him, only to close one eye in a brief wince moments later and collapse back onto his older twin. This caused a bark of laughter to erupt from the dark-haired teenager, succeeded immediately by a fist thudding onto his shaking chest. The air left him with a choke as the mirthful racket died down instantly; he raised his right hand to the abused area, rubbing absently and frowning at his brother. "Would you stop _doing_ that? I'm starting to think you're _trying_ to bruise me."

"Maybe I'm trying to leave my own mark," came the glib reply as Kaoru's golden eyes slid closed and he wrapped his arms around Hikaru's shoulders, sighing as he pulled himself closer. Instantaneously, the hand in his hair pulled back and he almost let out a whine of complaint before strong arms encircled him in another sheltering hug. _He's too damn possessive for his own good,_ Kaoru thought, nose rubbing against his twin's collarbone as he forced his thoughts down before he considered the possibility that the avaricious attachment of his brother might be too much for his own good, as well. Certainly, it served to heighten his dependency on Hikaru.

For his part, the elder twin watched his brother silently, allowing him to relax and drift slowly towards slumber before turning his head to glance at windows lining the wall. _It's getting pretty bright out... we'll be-_ His thoughts broke off there, however, as he looked back at Kaoru's face, noting the loosening of the small muscles that made up his - their - features. "Tired?" he murmured, smiling softly at the quiet hum of affirmation, tracing light circles into the skin of his brother's back. His hands drifted lower as he continued softly, "We'll say we're sick and just skip, if you'd prefer." Kaoru seemed to take a liking to that idea, snuggling closer and burying his face against Hikaru's chest...

...only to bolt upright less than one second later, eyes wide and almost accusatory as he stared down at his dark-haired twin. "...Not sure I'll survive another day _alone_ with you," he muttered, looking away when Hikaru laughed brightly. The thought apparently had won out against his throbbing nerves and aching, sore muscles.

"I do know how to keep my hands to myself, you know. It's not like I want to hurt you," Hikaru retorted sullenly, although Kaoru knew that the tone wasn't even remotely serious as his twin sat up, tugging him back into a warm hug. "You should have told me to stop when it got uncomfortable." The whisper was filled with a mixture of concern, hurt, and remorse as the now-brunette laced his fingers back into Kaoru's hair to stroke it tenderly once again. He hated knowing that he'd caused his beloved younger twin harm; that was something that he'd always viewed as unforgivable. Kaoru merely nodded against him, and to anyone else, the action would have been misplaced, but Hikaru knew. He knew that Kaoru understood the slight turmoil he found himself in at the mere idea of having hurt him, and knew that his brother was telling him in his own way that, next time, he would speak up. This heralded the return of his smile as he kissed his twin's forehead. "I guess we should get ready if you really don't want to skip."

The simple sigh that followed was a sign of Kaoru's acquiescence; the two pulled apart, Hikaru sliding out of the bed before turning and offering a hand to his younger brother, helping him out of the bed and holding him close en route to their bathroom. As they walked together, Kaoru leaned his head against Hikaru's shoulder, thinking on the previous day.

"You know... I really liked it." The words were quiet and displaced, and, as such, they took a few moments to sink into Hikaru. Once they finally did, he grinned mischievously, his hand sliding low on his brother's back. However, just before he'd reached Kaoru's butt, the redhead spoke again, his tone bordering dangerously close to scolding. "But we're not having a repeat performance of yesterday morning right now." At the disappointed groan that his older brother had been unsuccessful in holding back, he laughed, pressing closer to him. "We'll be late if we do anything like that this morning, Hikaru." Golden eyes watched him curiously before the other boy nodded.

Both knew that it had little to do with the possibility of arriving late for school and even less to do with any sense of modesty that the two often all but lacked. It also, surely, had nothing to do with nervousness, for there was no nauseating flutter in Kaoru's stomach or unbearable beating in Hikaru's chest. But Hikaru would not question it, Kaoru would not explain, and they would together weave one tale or another to account for the awkward movements that the younger twin would surely make that day due to his attempts at preventing the aggravation of his sore bottom - the true reason behind his insistence of not duplicating the previous morning's activities.

After all, he'd dealt with it well enough as they'd come together repeatedly just one day earlier, but Monday morning had brought with it an almost pleasantly painful ache born out of his loss of virginity, and somewhere in both of their minds, they knew - fully understood - that anything more would drive it from pleasant to torturous.

So they showered together, wrapped in each other's arms under the blissful cascade of water, fingers massaging each other's hair, palms running flat over bare flesh in a strange, sensual almost-dance that spoke volumes of lust, of passion, and of intimacy. It hovered precariously near territory that they had, at one time, known should be forbidden - territory that they had heedlessly pressed into just one day ago. But Hikaru's hands didn't linger and Kaoru's kisses didn't become overly inviting, leaving things as innocent as could be expected in the face of a relationship that _that_ world would deem immoral.

_Their_ world didn't care.

They took a strange sort of comfort in that, even as they realized conjointly that such thoughts likely meant that they were regressing, in a way. Falling back into old patterns and thoughts that they had been breaking free of.

With a shiver, Kaoru's hand immediately found its way up to Hikaru's hair, brushing through the short dark ash strands, amber eyes watching as the unnatural color contrasted in a pleasing way with the pale skin of his hand. He'd grown used to seeing Hikaru look like this, now that he thought about it. It was... refreshing, in a way. Not to say that he'd minded in any way when they had been 'perfect physical reflections' of one another, but he liked the immediate distinguishablity, as well. Not because it made it more obvious that he wasn't simply 'kissing himself' whenever the two of them did anything. That had never been an issue for him; there had never been a single time in his life where he'd looked at Hikaru and seen himself, even if _they_ couldn't tell one from the other.

No, he enjoyed the fact that they were now visually distinct from one another because it was much as they had said in that first act they'd pulled for their fans after Hikaru had dyed his hair: it accentuated their differences and served as a greater reminder of just how much they could do for each other by each being his own, unique self. His gaze found Hikaru's, gold meeting identical gold, and both could only smile, no words necessary between them to understand that they'd both been thinking the same thing.

And as their gaze broke from one another, Kaoru took a moment to reflect that it certainly didn't hurt matters that Hikaru more than pulled the look off: he looked _hot_ with dark hair. But, then again, it was Kaoru's opinion that Hikaru would be able to pull off any look exceedingly well. And if asked, Hikaru would likely insist that the same was true for him... but only after having made some boastfully egotistical comment about how he was always hot, so of _course_ he could pull anything off.

If he didn't love his twin so much, Kaoru would find himself rather appalled at his brother's sometimes _too_ frequent self-centered conceit. But he supposed it was alright, as long as he didn't sink to the level of a certain blond 'lord.'

His fingers tightened in strands of wet, dark hair, his free hand coming up to join the first as he pulled himself closer, lips parting and eyes closing halfway; a shiver passed through his body and he looked almost desperate for as much gentle contact as possible. "Hikaru..." A finger pressed against his lips, silencing him perfectly as Hikaru pulled back and led him to their vanity, urging him to sit down without uttering a single word. The finger on his lips was removed, replaced momentarily by a gentle pressure from Hikaru's mouth, a familiarly chaste kiss that he pulled back from quickly, smiling as he pressed their foreheads together, hands on Kaoru's head and fingers combing through wet, copper hair in mimicry of his twin's hold on his own head.

"How about I take care of yours for you, and you can deal with mine?" Just like they'd done so many times before. The redhead merely nodded, closing his eyes and shifting uncomfortably where he was perched; his nerves were protesting to his current position, and he suddenly had a sinking feeling that the day would be far worse than he had imagined. At least, if this discomfort that bordered so closely to scorching pain was any indication.

His eyes were clenched shut tighter than he'd thought, and it took some significant effort to open them again when he realized that Hikaru hadn't moved, save to trail one hand down to his neck. Usually, his brother wasted very little time when it came to styling his hair, and he certainly didn't let it air dry for very long. Frowning, Kaoru looked up to meet his eyes, only to find a concerned amber gaze transfixed to the spot where slender fingers brushed lightly over the skin of his neck. Hikaru was muttering something under his breath that Kaoru couldn't quite make out, which bothered him enough to reach one hand to take hold of his twin's, tilting his head to the side. "Hikaru?"

Silence. He remained staring at Kaoru's neck, licking his lips once or twice before finally leaning in, adjusting the position of his hand to brush his hand over a particularly sensitive area. The younger twin's initial thought was that Hikaru hadn't given up on the hope of seducing him before leaving the house, fully expecting a pleasurable jolt to course through him at the action.

He was frighteningly surprised when, instead, he was rocked by an almost blistering sting, honey eyes widening with his shock.

"This might be a little difficult to cover up," the elder of the two murmured; there was an apology in those words for the added pain he'd caused to him and Kaoru couldn't help but smile at it, shifting in spite of his continued physical aggravation to wrap his arms around his brother's waist, nodding his head just enough for Hikaru to feel. The hand left his neck, tangling into his hair once more before both hands slid down to his shoulders, gently pushing him back. A soft kiss was pressed to his forehead as the dark-haired teen reached for their hair dryer. "...Tell me if this makes it hurt worse." There was no room for arguing with his comment; it wasn't a request, but a command. The younger twin knew that he had no choice but to obey. This time, at least.

Hikaru's extreme care was touching, though, and every time that Kaoru tensed slightly, he noticed immediately, briefly pressing the cool air button on the hair dryer to blow soothingly cold air over the marks littering his neck. Kaoru's gold eyes slid closed each time he did that, humming in appreciative thanks.

When Hikaru finally set the the small appliance down and began to actually style his brother's hair, both twins smiled again, sharing a companionable silence as he arranged the soft, copper hair artfully and then paused, searching for something before pulling back with a victorious grin, sliding two clips into the right side of Kaoru's hair. Another chaste kiss was placed on slightly parted lips as the younger twin blinked his eyes open before turning to look into the mirror, raising an eyebrow questioningly at the choice. "You always looked good like that," was the simple reply to the unspoken question, and it was left at that as they switched places, Kaoru returning the favor of drying and styling his brother's hair for him.

Unconsciously, he began to reach towards the clips to pick up two that would match his own, an action built purely out of old habits. A hand closed around his wrist before his fingers could touch any of them, however, and he blinked down at Hikaru, frowning slightly. "Not necessary." He blinked again, further confused before realization hit: there hadn't been a need to go so far as to accessorize identically since before Hikaru had dyed his hair. Even if it had largely been a comforting habit before that had further supported their combined identity. But there was also a hidden meaning in the two simple words, as though Hikaru was saying to him, _"Only if that's your preference."_ Just as he'd selected the clips for Kaoru based on his fondness for the look on his younger twin, he'd let Kaoru choose his style for that day based on his own likes and dislikes. Eying the brunette for a few moments, he smiled gently and took a step back, a quiet signal that he was done.

It took less than a second for Hikaru to rise and wrap his arms around his younger twin, drawing him into a loving and lingering kiss. There was no hesitance as Kaoru kissed back, arms wrapping around his brother's shoulders to pull himself closer as his lips parted in an invitation that the brunette was exceedingly happy to accept, tongue slipping past soft, smooth, rosy lips to probe into his twin's waiting mouth. He barely held back his appreciative groan as Kaoru lightly sucked at the warm muscle, pulling him in a little farther; it took extreme effort on his part for Hikaru to finally manage to pull back. "We need to finish getting ready. And do something about..."

Uncharacteristically self-conscious suddenly, Kaoru raised one hand to cover his neck, frowning again as he turned to the mirror to inspect the job that Hikaru had done on him the day before. "Concealer," he sighed out in slight annoyance, but his brother was a step ahead of him, pushing his hand out of the way to get to work covering up the incriminating red marks littering the marginally younger teen's neck. Kaoru watched his actions boredly, frowning again. "I can't _believe_ you gave me a hickey..." he muttered.

He was not quite expecting the snort of amusement that Hikaru let out. "Just one?" came the mocking question as the older twin took a step back to eye his work, frowning in consternation before picking the concealer back up to apply some more, lips brushing Kaoru's ear when he leaned in to whisper to him, "It's not my fault that you're so delicious, you know." He felt his twin tense up at the words and laughed softly, helping him up once satisfied with his work.

It wasn't until long after they were both dressed - impeccably as always - in their uniforms, when they found themselves in the backseat of their car with Hikaru's arms around Kaoru in another protective embrace as the younger of the two laid on the seat as best as he could in a space that was far too cramped for someone of their height to lie perfectly, that Kaoru finally began to reflect on his decision not to remain home. Looking up at his brother, he felt warm lips against his forehead; he didn't need to look to know that Hikaru had closed his eyes and was simply savoring the present physical closeness, and that would be enough right then. After all, it wasn't as though Kaoru was so weak that he'd let some _discomfort_ dictate how he spent his day.

That was what he liked to tell himself, at least.

Unfortunately, he wasn't so sure of the assertion once they arrived at school. Shifting out of his brother's arms to sit properly left him hissing deeply, but he composed himself before their driver opened the door for them to slide out. His hand caught Hikaru's as soon as they were out in the morning sunlight, amber meeting amber as Kaoru's eyes conveyed the concern that had finally managed to work its way into his mind.

_What if we can't cover this up?_

It was going to be an interesting day, to say the least.


End file.
